Your Questions About Baby Care

Charles asks…

Why is hospital policy so different in different countries???

Ok i live in Tasmania Australia

And being on this site i read alot of questions and a lot of people know how engaged and dialated they are at like 32 and 34 weeks

But in Tassie they will only check you if you come in with full on contractions or past 41 weeks
We dont get offered the membrane sweep

And another thing i dont understand is why your hospitals provide so much stuff for you while in hospital

We are given a sheet of paper with what we have to take into the hospital with us
We are provided with one free nappy, 1 pair of breast pads and 2 sanitary pads while in the hospital
We are even asked to bring in our own blankets for baby to sleep in and we are asked to take baby clothes and wipes they dont provide it at all here
When i asked a question on here about if i had packed enough people thought i was nuts packing all i did but i packed what was on the hospital sheet

I just dont understand how you are all provided with so much and we arent ???
I went to hospital the other night with contractions and they put me on a mahine to see if they register but when i asked to see if i was dialated they refused and said only if contractions were less than 5 minutes apart

Also we cant get induced unless for a medical reason such as baby in distress or high blood pressure and ive seen so many people say just as to be induced i wish

I am sort of ranting now as i want to know if i am making any progress at all arggghhhh

Oh and im 38 weeks pregnant

The Expert answers:

I also think it varies State to State in Australia as well…I had my lil man a year ago in NSW at Mona Vale hospital and I was a bit worried because I heard so many yuk public system stories….they were great though but you are right when you say they dont check out stuff…. I was induced at 39 weeks because I had SPD and was in so much pain…..I think they will only induce for non medical if you are way over!!! Public system can work out really well for some and others its not so good!!! They gave me a bag a of nappies for my bubba, but I will admit I am extreamly nice and often people will go out of their way to help me out!! I didnt like the hospital pad so I got my own, but they let me use as many as I wanted….you will find that when you get in to hospital they do have pads and nappies for you to use, i think they just prefer you to bring your own so you dont use up what they have!! I may go private next time just because i will have the split pelvis again and our obgyn friend was more helpful with all that than the hospital!!! If you have your own doctor the whole way through you will find you have more information….i personally was sitting the whole pregnancy so I read and read and this was fantastic for me!!!
Its better to have too much rather than going in with hardly anything and then not having stuff in there!!! It is a pain when you feel like you have no info…next checkup go in with a million questions and smile lots and no complaining and you will find they are very helpful……i was on crutches and painkillers after I gave birth and after 30 hr labour I was in a room with a woman that snored worse than a man and didnt sleep…..because i was not complaining and I just whispered to a really nice nurse that I hadnt slept for a few days and could I go out to the tv room to take a nap….within 20 minutes she came to get me and moved all my stuff to a private room….. The snoring lady wouldnt stop complaining about back pain and sore boobs and bla bla and i had some serious issues and didnt winge at all and was offered better service the whole time I was in!!
Be the nicest you have ever been, nurses hear complaining all day and its refreshing for them to have a happy and nice patient!!! Sorry i went off coarse a bit…good luck though and read up this week while you are waiting for bubba to come…how exciting for you though!!!

Susan asks…

why does my ex boyfriend contact me/want to meet/still go on holiday?he broke up with me!?

so sorry for the long post…am just at my wits end and feel so gutted 🙁
Why does my ex boyfriend still want to go on holiday with me?We just broke up!?he says he has really been looking forward to going away…with me and still is looking forward to it and that “we need a break” ie a seems as though it could be a solution to stuff going on here stress at work etc.this was said when he was breaking up with me and when we were discussing….
My ex boyfiend dumped me out of the blue on monday. we would have been together for 5 months. i was totally shocked given that he has alwyas been the one that has been more interested in me. it took a long while for me to establish that this relationship was something special.his reasons for breaking up are, “we dont click”, he just doesnt feel the same anymore, he doesnt get excited to see me like he used to, he hasnt missed me over the past week when i hadnt seen him. i asked him how long he has been feeling this way which he replied “a couple of weeks” which to me is not that long in the grand schem of things. i spent the whole weekend at his house a couple of weeks ago (all his idea-he was not playing football and wanted me there) and we had a really nice time, get on well, good banter, affectionate and no sign whatsoever that he was getting cold feet. when i was 5 minutes down the road from leaving his house he had already text saying “it was amazing spending time with you this weekend have a safe journey”and was constantly texting like he usually does for the rest of the day. alwyas reeeeally sweet funny messages.calls me, and if i call and he misses the clll he will immediately call back. we went away for a long weekend a couple of months ago which was lovely, we booked a 2 week holiday to the bahamas just a month ago which we meant to be going on in a month!!he says he still wants to go with me, not because its easy (as i have booked it it is in our names etc…i mean we could easily change the names) he says coz he knows we will have a great time, can imagine throwing me in the water, having a laugh etc and we need a break.)he said even if cheryl cole wanted to go he wouldnt want to, the other only person would be his father!!he says he wants to be friends, i havent done anything wrong and that he thinks we will see more of eeach other now we have broken up.nb we dont live close to each other and havent got same circle of friends so its not exactly easy)when i left his after the breakup talk he text me an hour later saying he looks forward to seeing me next week (we have arranged this)if he has been feeling this way for a couple of weeks why has he been texting saying the cutest things ever and acting like he really cares, holding hands, tactile etc etc

what does this all mean?is he wanting to meet me out of pity?still go away with me as thinks it will let me down gently??i am sooo confused!but i want him back.this behaviour is totally the contrary of the best part of our relationship. please help!!any suggestions as to what is going on would be greatly appreciated :)xxx
he says that his colleagues say he is a commitment phobe.does also the fact that he was adopted as a baby affect the way he is behaving??
he has initiated all text contact since he broke up with mindless chat!!i really dont get it!

he says he doesnt want any girlfiend for a long time and that he wants to go to australia.reasons are a bit poor to be honest, one being the weather here being crap and its “some job opportunity” when he mentioned this to me on the phone i said he couldnt go coz i liked him too much and i would miss him.his response was “well come with me then” to which i replied “er no” i was so shocked with the rest of the chat.
he has contacted me via text/work email and instant message on facebook this evening-every day since we broke up a week ago.on sunday he wanted to see when i was free next week!why?!?i really do want him back and do believe that we work well together. It would be a shame to throw what we had away.he has told me he loves me 4 times and he never felt this way about a girl before-never wanted to go on holiday with a girlfriend before even!i never told him i loved him.would this affect the way he is behaving?

i know he is definitely not seeing another girl, talks to his parents about me all the time etc etc and facebook comments all over my profile.this is why its odd because he has always been more forward than me…it seems like i pushed for a bit more that weekend and he flipped at me getting annoyed with him for being ill/not spending the long weeken.aggggh! sorry for how long this is i just dont know what to do 🙁

The Expert answers:

Maybe he still loves you or he just don’t wanna end this relationship, maybe he wanna be friends with you and keep in touch with you?

Thomas asks…


im a 15 yr old male that has had bad trauma all my life since i was a baby every 2 nights my mum would drink to much and have the worst fits she would break thing shout at the top of her voice the most deteriorating things to me and my dad she would always go psychotic and say my dad didn’t want me and then she would go and buy more alchohol up at a liqour store and buy more or have glasses of my dads spirits my dad always tried to keep me safe but my mum would throw break open the door and say psycotic things to us i have had to deal with in my life her suicide attempts and the cops taking her away all i hear pretty much every night is just shouting i get very stressed and scared and the worst thing she would suck you in and love you and say she would never do it again SHE IS A CONTROL FREAK ASWELL i felt like i lost my manhood! i have had all my life up to this up to a week ago when my mum was forced into detox. i have never had a normal life everyone sensed my shyness stress and tension i never did good in school i wasent very friendly and i got teased for being like i was i never went to parties i never had a gf, i got into drugs and all i never went to school i got deppresed. the doc told me it can cause so many problems when stuff like this has happened to me i have been to many psychiatrists and cat scan electro feedback things because i actually started to have psychotic episodes from from all the trauma. i feel so much better now i am actually a normal human being before i thought i wasnt normal, i feel more free like a burdens been lift off me i can communicate better to people now but im still finding it hard to get over it im just very tense and stressed that no one can touch my back because its so sore. i am in a band now in australia now i have to go and preform in a music studio with these producers when im 16 and its getting overbearing living my life because i have so much to do every day theres alot more but i will stop there.
Please help me i just want to forget all about it i am open to any suggestions

The Expert answers:

I’m a 15 year old girl, and although I have a relatively normal family life, my father pushes me to a breaking point. I’ve cut myself on and off in the past two years. I have a pretty crazy social life and three of my very close friends have tried to commit suicide in the past year and a half (and that’s just the easy stuff).

Seeing your situation from the outside has given me a lot of hope for you. It is extremely important that you are reaching out for help. That makes all the difference.

I know one thing that has helped me overcome my depression was having a distraction. Lately, I’ve thrown myself into film making and I am making a film which I am very passionate about. This gives me a reason to go on.

Once a friend told me to meditate. He’s not really the type you’d expect that from, but apparently he does all the time. Just sitting outside and breathing fresh air while trying not to think of anything at all can make such a difference. I would recomend that.

Another thing my friends have tried is acting. They say it’s a great escape because they don’t have to be themselves. Maybe if your past is troubling you, it would be helpful to step away from that and be someone else for awhile.

Also, if you’re 16 and in a band that successful, you seem to already have something to strive for. You should be proud of your accomplishments which are only magnified by your stormy past. I think it’s amazing that you’ve come so far, and could only ever hope to be as strong as you. You’re sucess inspires me.

That being said, please stay away from drugs and alcahol. Stay in school. I know that you must be extreamly strong, mentally, and based on what I’ve heard, you could turn your life around. I have faith that you can do great things.

Richard asks…

My sugar gliders have mated!?

In case they have offspring, I want to write up an information paper for anyone who is considering buying them from me.
Just to avoid any confusion.
And I need to know what all Im missing.
This is what I have so far
Sorry if the spelling is a bit off my keyboard is half broken. Lol.

Sugar gliders are a member of the marsupial family, native to Australia, New Guinea, and the Bismarck Archipelago. They are active during the night hours and tend to sleep during the day. This makes them great pets, because it means that while your out doing your daily activities, they can come with you asleep in your pocket/bra undetected. Sugar gliders have a squirrel-like body with a long fluffy tail, making them rather appealing. They have soft fur that can vary in color. Different colors include gray, cinnamon, platinum, white and a few others in between. Most sugar gliders have a dark stripe that stretches from their nose to their mid back.
Gliders have five digits on each foot, including two “thumbs” on their hind feet. Also the second and third digit on their hind legs are fused together. From their hind legs to their “hands” they posses a “sky diver” like membrane, which puts them into the “glider” category. This allows them to glide up to 150 meters.
Another on of the fabulous perks of this pet is their extraordinary vocal range. Just to name a few, soft chirping, loud chirping, hissing, barking, clicking, crabbing, and even singing.(If babies are in pouch) All of these sounds have different meanings that can vary from glider to glider. I have found that “crabbing” ( a loud, pencil sharpener like noise) usually only occurs in one of he following situations: Your glider has just been woken up from a nice nap, you glider is “pouch aggressive” and does not like the interruption, when “telling off” another glider, or your glider is afraid. Chirping occurs when your glider is happy and is much like the concept of a purring cat. Barking for me has only occur when frustrated about changes in their habitat like removing a pouch for the wash. Hissing on the other hand usually occurs when your glider poops.
Sounds like a great pet right ? Well, there are a few catches. First off, sugar gliders are exotic pet and are not cheap. For my three gliders I spend about 30 bucks a month. This doesn’t even include the initial price of the sugar gliders, the glider cage, cage supplies, the bonding pouch, or even vet bills. (Although sugar gliders do not require vaccinations.) Just their daily diet plan. I have heard that other cheaper diets can work well, but they tend to require incorporation of many other elements outside the staple food. My rule is, if I haven’t seen it work tremendously for someone else, it probably wont for me.
Secondly, sugar gliders that go on un-stimulated, are prone to depression, mutilation or even death in extreme cases. This can be avoided with the use of toys like bells, ladders, feather teasers, sugar glider safe wheels (not all are safe for sugar gliders because their long tail may potentially becoming entangled between the bars of the wheel.) ropes, stuffed animals or even baby toys. You should also purchase a cheap zip up tent, so that you and your gliders can play together in a care-free environment. I would recommend an hour of “tent time” a day for a well adjusted glider.
Sugar gliders require a lot of attention, especially if housed in small groups. If left without, sugar gliders have been known to make a ton of noises in search of attention, making the night hours impossible to sleep through if they’re close by. I have never experienced this with any of my gliders, but many others have.
Another thing, if your glider has not been socialized to humans, it will bite! These creatures are anything but domesticated, and I dont care what anyone will tell you, it hurts and if theyre really scared they can even draw blood.
Some have argued that it is okay to restrain a glider with a leash, this is simply not true. Leashes only effectively remain on a glider if wrapped around the mid section, as well as the neck. This posses a problem if your little fur ball decides to take a leap, because the leash restricts the sensitive flying membrane. Meaning that if this leash stops your glider in mid flight, it can be injured. The truth is, becoming well bonded to your sugar glider is the only effective way to keep it near you without being “pouched.” In my experience and that of all others that I am aware of, when glider learns to trust you, it will follow you around hopelessly.
Gliders require a cage of at least 2 feet to 3 feet, but bigger is certainly always better. You can take several approaches to this. You can purchase a large bird cage, a “Reptarium” (which come i
If you only want a single it is 300.
But if you want two, you get the second one free because they do best in pairs.
I live in Oregon by the way.
Nope I don’t have lineage on my gliders, well actually I do for my male since he used to be a breeder for a friend of mine, but I don’t actually care. Not to be rude, but lineage is an unnecessary way of tricking die hard sugar glider owners into paying more for they’re pets. Sorry to burst your bubble, but it is true. They is no difference in the danger of interbreeding a sugar glider to that of any other animal. I know both of my gliders originated in different areas, so to assume they were related would be very far fetched. And in the case that there was anything wrong with any of my joeys, they would be kept to insure safety to there special needs and daddy would be neutered right after.

You bring up a good point about only using fleece materials, thanks.

And since I live in Oregon, where most people purchasing do not know the meaning of those color labels, I opted to just call em as they are.

The Expert answers:

Some problems with your advertisement…

They do not sleep all day, though they will usually stay in their sleeping pouch or nest box during the day (if in the cage). It is not uncommon though to hear them grooming, or moving about, so..they’re not really the best pet to carry around to places that you absolutely do not want them to be noticed at.

Color variations, use legit names, leu, creamino, lion, standard gray, mosaic, albino, platinum….

Barking can also mean that they are simply calling out to another glider, or to YOU if they’re bonded with you.

Ropes are not safe for sugar gliders as their nails can get caught in it, and ropes can unravel. What works instead are fleece braids. Personal opinion is that most stuffed animals are also not at all safe.

The cage size is recommended to be NO SMALLER than 3 feet tall by 3 feet wide x 2 feet deep for a pair of gliders..

I can’t read the rest of your ad as it cuts off after you suggest Repatriums.

I would state what the drawbacks are a bit more clearly. Also put an emphasis on the fact that they MUST be kept in pairs.

Now, that said, do you have LINEAGE on your gliders???
If not, they should NOT be breeding.

Anyway, I $300 is a bit pricey for a standard gray, even if the glider has excellent lineage.. They typically go for around $150 with lineage. If you don’t have lineage, selling the glider for anything more than $100 is a bit crazy.

David asks…

Do you feel bad for women that put off childbearing for their self centered reasons & later have trouble?

I read a question similar a few minutes ago and i agree. If you don’t like the question, you are free to move on to another.

I heard on the news about a woman who spent her young years in sports and stuff and decided she was ready to have a baby when she was late 40’s and then had to use an fertility treatment or something because she had trouble conceiving. What do they expect. They had plenty of years to have children but chose to put other stuff first so I say they deserve what they get. Most of these women could have married earlier and had children but decided to put it off for more “important things”. They are very selfish giving their young years to sports or a career and then burdening their children with their old age when the children are still teenagers.

I have a hard time dealing with women who are surprised they have trouble conceiving at 34-46, when most mothers that age have teenagers. I think there’s nothing wrong with finishing your education, or establishing a steady career before you procreate. I don’t mean women like this. I am talking about the ones that actually have this enormous agenda, like travel the world, become president of their company, make a million, build an enormous house, wait til their bodies are worn out…they plan and they plan and they triumph, and then when they can’t get pregnant at 46, they cry to you and tell you that’s what they most wanted, and if they had it to do all over again, they’d have had children earlier! It’s hard to listen to this. If it happens you don’t marry until you are older, that can’t be blamed. And I’m certainly not in favor of teen pregnancy. But why are so many women waiting to their old.

I’ve heard a lot of people say that they will have more to give their children, but that’s a sort of vague idea. They talk about financial security and maturity, but what about energy? Ask people who had children at both 21 and 31, none of them will tell you it wasn’t harder older. I mean, isn’t your health and vitality a consideration in this matter? If you’re giving birth at 34- 46, your child graduates when you are50- 64. Your kids will be teased because their parents look like their grandparents? No wonder why Australia doesn’t allow fertilization.

Just like someone else said ‘ If you live long enough to see your grandchildren, what will you be able to give them’?

It might not be my problem, but people are so quick to judge teens that have babies when its none of their business. Also when people have kids with disorders and genetic diseases, they usually cant afford to take care of them, so its the tax payers who do. When older women have kids they are putting them at risk for which is so selfish its disgusting. Why don’t people see a problem with this, but they are so quick to judge other women like teens etc?

The Expert answers:

I see nothing wrong with your argument and i agree with it completely.

Linko’s answer is ridiculous. Lets see some proof to back up your comments. I am from a single parent household and i am a very successful person. I make 7k a week (on a good week) and i have never been in any trouble. Nor have my 3 brothers. My Grandma lost her husband and had to raise 7 kids on her own and they are all outstanding citizens who never had any problems. My roommates mother lost both her parents when she was 18. They left behind 9 children which she raised herself with the help of another sister and they all turned out fine. It has a lot to do with the parent who did raise you & any intelligent person would know that. You mock the pain of people who lost a parent young and then insult them by throwing out unfounded stereotypes & question the kind of person they are? I know people who had two parents and they are the scum of the earth. 6 kids in my high school commited suicide and they had two parents. One kid in my high school stabbed his mom to death & he had two parents. You have no idea what your talking about.

You also judge and mock the parent who lost somebody and now have to raise kids on their own. You have a lot of gull. You are a very sad person and when this happens to your kids or grandchildren i hope you remember the comments you make now.

Linko, you are wrong period point blank. And just because some people who have kids arent married & dont live together doesn’t mean the father is not in the childs life.
Read this and weep : There are plenty of arguments that go against what you say everywhere you just clearly only see and believe what you want to. Its sad that you choose the negative.

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