Mark asks…
What items should I put in a care package for my pregnant sister?
I’m throwing a baby shower for my sister who is 8 months pregnant. I would like to put together a basket for her that is all about her. Some items I’ve already thought of are a coupon for a pedicure, water bottle, socks, tea, itunes card….
The items should be things that she can use in the delivery room or that she can use before/after the delivery to pamper herself. Any mothers out there that can tell me what you would want in your expectant mother care package?? 🙂
P.S: My sis is diabetic, so any food ideas should be sugar free! 🙂
The Expert answers:
I like your ideas so far!
Other good ideas may be:
a magazine or two
gum/candy
slippers
lotion
body wash/loofah
snacks
A Baby’s R Us (or the like) gift card
Helen asks…
How does this solution to the welfare dilemma sound?
I have an idea about how to solve the welfare problem that I don’t think is prejudiced against anyone.
Why don’t we pick a date nine months from today and pass a law that says that everyone (legal and illegal) that is on welfare will not receive welfare benefits for any children born after that date. Those that are currently pregnant will not receive benefits for any children born after the birth of that child.
As part of the law, the people affected by it will be supplied with ANY method of birth control that they desire, even one (1) abortion (which I am COMPLETELY opposed to), as long as it is within the FIRST trimester, at no cost to them. If they choose to have an abortion after the first trimester, they will not be able to have it paid for by the system, and will not be eligible to receive monetary benefits.
Also, as part of the law, the mother of the child should be declared ineligible to collect welfare if she cannot provide the name and address of the father, so that he can be pursued for support payments. I am appalled at the way young girls today have sex with multiple partners, get pregnant and have no idea who the father is (I watch Maury because I’m fascinated by the lack of shame shown by the young men and women that admit to mulitple partners and illegitimate babies). They don’t care because the tax payers are going to be FORCED to pick up the tab.
For those that have children born after the nine month date, they would receive benefits in the form of coupons for baby formula, diapers, food stamps, etc., until the child is five years old, but no monetary payments. They would also have to provide proof that they are actively attempting to/or receiving monetary support from the father of the child in order to collect the coupon benefits. After the child turns 5 and starts school, they would receive no more benefits unless they were actually employed, and then the benefits would still be in the form of food stamps only, until it could be shown that the support is no longer necessary.
Any welfare recipient that is addicted to drugs or alcohol, would not even be able to leave the hospital with the child. This is for the protection of the child, not punishment for the mother. If they cannot get themselves into treatment (of course this would have to be provided for by the taxpayers) and show that they are recovered and able to care for the child within one year, the child would then be placed for adoption. Sounds cruel to the parent? Sound crueler to me to put the child in jeopardy with an addicted or alcoholic parent. (My parents had 130 foster children over the course of 20 years many of whom were the product of such addictive, abusive behavior, so I’m not just talking thru my hat here).
Naturally, you will have a LOT of people that will immediately become pregnant to take advantage before the law affects them (get one more in so to speak), but after that, I believe the numbers would drop off dramatically.
This would provide plenty of jobs for social workers, recovery centers, coupon printers, and private investigators trying to find the absent fathers to make them support their children.
People that are not on welfare, don’t collect any money from the government if they decide to have children, whether planned or unplanned, (isn’t that discriminatory against them), so why should welfare recipients be rewarded for having children that they cannot afford to support and sometimes have no idea who even fathered the child?
It angers me to see responsible people struggle to provide for their families due to job loss and having to provide proof that they are looking for work in order to collect the unemployment benefits they worked for (sometimes for most of their lives). Then, when the benefits run out in two years or so, if they are still unable to find work,they lose everything and are forced to live in their cars or on the street because they are not eligible for welfare, food stamps or any benefits afforded to unwed mothers and illegal aliens.
Many illegal aliens work in our country “off the books” so to speak and receive cash payments. This makes them eligible to collect benefits because there is no proof that they have any income. If they are going to be here working and taking American jobs, then they need to be paying taxes and providing proof of how they are managing to pay their living expenses, before they can apply for any benefits. I mean if they have a place to live and car to drive they HAVE to be making money somewhere, or am I crazy?
Well, I’m sorry to rant and rave, but it seems as though we are becoming the minorities in our own country. We are forced to press one for “english” in our own country. I feel that if you can’t speak the language, you should not be allowed to drive. How can you safely drive if you can’t read the signs? There are just too many ab
The Expert answers:
Welfare should be abolished completely, because you pay people to be in bad situations. I have a link to an interesting debate between my favorite author and some lady.
I like the line “I find it interesting how you start in the middle of the story…”
However you can abolish ALL of these programs by setting up a system where the tax is based around a number different from 0. You tax around a desired income level, and if a person makes less than they have negative income tax. This way, there is always an incentive to work, although perhaps lessened. It would also reduce the amount of bureaucracy and abuse from the current welfare system. I would refer you to “Free to Choose” By Milton and Ann Friedman.
As for Illegal immigration, it wouldn’t be a problem if we weren’t a welfare state. Because we hand out money, it is unclear if we benefit. Without government hand outs, it is clear that our society benefits from their labor and economic activity that they bring with them. However when society and tax payers have to pay for social things for them, it is unclear if we benefit or not. We may, we may not.
Lisa asks…
How does this solution for welfare sound?
have an idea about how to solve the welfare problem that I don’t think is prejudiced against anyone.
Why don’t we pick a date nine months from today and pass a law that says that everyone (legal and illegal) that is on welfare will not receive welfare benefits for any children born after that date. Those that are currently pregnant will not receive benefits for any children born after the birth of that child.
As part of the law, the people affected by it will be supplied with ANY method of birth control that they desire, even one (1) abortion (which I am COMPLETELY opposed to), as long as it is within the FIRST trimester, at no cost to them. If they choose to have an abortion after the first trimester, they will not be able to have it paid for by the system, and will not be eligible to receive monetary benefits.
Also, as part of the law, the mother of the child should be declared ineligible to collect welfare if she cannot provide the name and address of the father, so that he can be pursued for support payments. I am appalled at the way young girls today have sex with multiple partners, get pregnant and have no idea who the father is (I watch Maury because I’m fascinated by the lack of shame shown by the young men and women that admit to mulitple partners and illegitimate babies). They don’t care because the tax payers are going to be FORCED to pick up the tab.
For those that have children born after the nine month date, they would receive benefits in the form of coupons for baby formula, diapers, food stamps, etc., until the child is five years old, but no monetary payments. They would also have to provide proof that they are actively attempting to/or receiving monetary support from the father of the child in order to collect the coupon benefits. After the child turns 5 and starts school, they would receive no more benefits unless they were actually employed, and then the benefits would still be in the form of food stamps only, until it could be shown that the support is no longer necessary.
Any welfare recipient that is addicted to drugs or alcohol, would not even be able to leave the hospital with the child. This is for the protection of the child, not punishment for the mother. If they cannot get themselves into treatment (of course this would have to be provided for by the taxpayers) and show that they are recovered and able to care for the child within one year, the child would then be placed for adoption. Sounds cruel to the parent? Sound crueler to me to put the child in jeopardy with an addicted or alcoholic parent. (My parents had 130 foster children over the course of 20 years many of whom were the product of such addictive, abusive behavior, so I’m not just talking thru my hat here).
Naturally, you will have a LOT of people that will immediately become pregnant to take advantage before the law affects them (get one more in so to speak), but after that, I believe the numbers would drop off dramatically.
This would provide plenty of jobs for social workers, recovery centers, coupon printers, and private investigators trying to find the absent fathers to make them support their children.
People that are not on welfare, don’t collect any money from the government if they decide to have children, whether planned or unplanned, (isn’t that discriminatory against them), so why should welfare recipients be rewarded for having children that they cannot afford to support and sometimes have no idea who even fathered the child?
It angers me to see responsible people struggle to provide for their families due to job loss and having to provide proof that they are looking for work in order to collect the unemployment benefits they worked for (sometimes for most of their lives). Then, when the benefits run out in two years or so, if they are still unable to find work,they lose everything and are forced to live in their cars or on the street because they are not eligible for welfare, food stamps or any benefits afforded to unwed mothers and illegal aliens.
Many illegal aliens work in our country “off the books” so to speak and receive cash payments. This makes them eligible to collect benefits because there is no proof that they have any income. If they are going to be here working and taking American jobs, then they need to be paying taxes and providing proof of how they are managing to pay their living expenses, before they can apply for any benefits. I mean if they have a place to live and car to drive they HAVE to be making money somewhere, or am I crazy?
Well, I’m sorry to rant and rave, but it seems as though we are becoming the minorities in our own country. We are forced to press one for “english” in our own country. I feel that if you can’t speak the language, you should not be allowed to drive. How can you safely drive if you can’t read the signs? There are just too many absurdities to go on.
WOW!! I touched a nerve. A little background, I don’t hate anyone, I wasn’t ranting, I was just offering an idea. My parents did not spoil me, I can’t afford to go to the doctor or dentist either, I work full time and I can barely afford groceries after the bills are paid.
My simple idea was that if women were not paid to have illegitmate babies, they would stop having them. If fathers were forced to support them, or go to jail, they would be more careful. What’s wrong with suggesting that people have enough self respect to at least know who fathered their child(ren)? I just don’t think it’s fair that people that choose to be married/together to raise their children don’t qualify for help, but if you don’t know/won’t tell who the father is you get paid. I’m NOT prejudice. I think the law should apply to everyone regardless of color, ethnicity, etc. I guess I’m just appalled at far we’ve sunk as a society that it’s ok to keep having babies with no visible means of support.
The Expert answers:
Simple Solution if you need to apply to welfare to have your child make it mandatory to give child up for adoption. You already proved you couldn’t support prior to having the child at least give the child a chance at a decent life.
If you come to welfare a second time in the same situation asking the state to support your child and pay for the birth of the child then again mandatory adoption and automatic sterilization done, then that keeps welfare mommas from constantly repeating the process,
for those having a temporary hardship deduct it from their social security earnings meaning if you take welfare you get less form social security later on. This would apply to those with 40 work credits,
birth control exists people use it.
This also would erase child support backlog since a large percentage of welfare momma;s either don’t know exactly who the father of the child is, or he isn’t going to pay anyways. Also might want to consider making it mandatory if father can support child then he is given child as an option since he can provide.
If you can’t support yourself prior to getting pregnant then you shouldn’t be having sex, cause if you can’t support yourself how do you expect to be able to support another life. Common sense.
Have some morals. They advertise neutering for animals maybe we need to apply that to society as a whole. Tired of paying for other peoples kids.
Jenny asks…
SO and also diapers.com things?
okay I will address the first thing harley has a fever so I do not want to take him out and I had things that needed to be picked up at the library and I also needed a book from a book store so I sent the SO to go do it but complained and complained about it. Does your SO ever complain about you asking him to go do errands?
And also I have Diapers.com coupons that you enter when you check out if some one needs them then feel free to email me they are for
A case of huggies diapers
seventh generation diapers
avent,born free,dr.browns a pack of 2 or 3 but only 1 of the 3 brands
natural baby skin care earth’s best by jason,avalon organics, or little twig item only one of those
pacifers first years,gerber, or playtex pacifiers
and 3 more things
Diaper rash jars
halo sleep sacks
and toy
if you wanna know the specific’s of the last 3 ask me and they are all limit to 1 house hold and expire 12/31/09
The Expert answers:
My husband never complain about doing errand or anything that has to do with his son. The only thing he complains about most of the time is doing household chores, he hated them! Most men do complain about doing errand, chores or anything that involves them moving off the couch. I don’t know what your SO does for a living but maybe he was just tired and felt like resting. I totally understand when my husband who is a driver just wants to walk to the store (10 min) away walking. If it is not due to being tired than I would suggest telling him that he needs to do his part in this relationship that is not just you. Trust me if he is like this now he will get worst as time goes by wanting you to do everything. These are just a few suggestions no stranger on here know your relationship better than you.
Linda asks…
I am thirteen and I want to find a job in Antelope- 95843. (Sacramento)?
I don’t want any jobs like baby sitting, car washing, or any that type of stuff. I want like to transport coupons to peoples houses. Please Help! Please list a web site. I want to be hired and don’t care how much to be payed.
The Expert answers:
Any work you do and earn money is a JOB.
Your options are limited. Most businesses want you to be 16 to hire you for gainful employment.
Time to be inventive, even though you say you don’t want this, re-think your attitude. At your age it will be very hard to earn money other ways. My suggestions to you:
Make up fliers and pass them around in your neighborhood.
Offer to do whatever work it is you want to do, such as :
Computer work, Babysit, Clean Garages, Organize Cupboards, File Papers, Wash Cars, Mow Lawns, Pull Weeds, Tutor the neighbors kids, wash Dogs, Dog sit, Clean the Pool, Assist the elderly, whatever…
Post first whatever it is you want to do or are good at …if you don’t want to wash cars or mow lawns, leave that off the flier.
However, You should keep your options open and make a decision after the persons call you instead of not giving them many reasons to call.
Say you are a student and available to work on weekends.
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